London OH Marathon

This was my 34th, including many small-town marathons, and one can't expect too much from the small ones. The big draw was the flat out-and-back on paved bike trail through farmland. It drew many runners from outside Ohio, maybe for fast running times. Union Jack flags were the decorations. (Though this corn town is as far from the U.K. as you can get.) The mayor welcomed us at the start, encouraging us to later patronize London shops. I've been to downtown London...WHAT shops? (He's a politician.) Other niceties were water and gels every two miles, painted mileage markers. A nice finisher medal, if that's your thing. Lack of city car exhaust. (But you trade exhaust for the stench of farm agri-chemicals.) Now the downside: little spectator cheering, even in town. The obligatory, annoying pop-rock blasting at the start. (I'm still waiting for good jazz at a marathon.) Brutal headwind for the westward return. Poor directional help after return to town (though cops used their patrol cars, and sirens, at main intersection!). Merely adequate post-race grub (bagels, bananas, Doritos, water). Bad traffic coordination on trail: a speed-freak bicyclist almost ran me over when I tried to get water because the table was on the left side of trail. Nobody warned him to slow down. He actually yelled at me to 'Get over!' (Jerk, I spent a hundred bucks to run here. YOU get over, or train for the Tour de France elsewhere.) Biggest gripe? The (supposed) Gatorade that was advertised. When even a race volunteer calls the liquid 'kinda gross,' you know things are bad. I'm guessing they used powder and mixed it half-strength, maybe quarter-strength. Again, I spent a hundred bucks and expect full electrolytes...or at least truth in advertising. VERY disappointing. I might not be so harsh had I not run one of the best small marathons in Virginia two weeks prior. But this race reminded me of one in tiny Van Wert, Ohio years ago. Van Wert was 'so bad it was actually good'; like something Barney Fife might have organized. THIS one was semi-bad, but without comedy. Glad I helped raise funds for London's park (no, not Kew Gardens), but won't return till they use real Gatorade and barricade arrogant bicyclists wearing brightly colored tights.